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The drawbacks of nesting for parents in California

On Behalf of | Mar 6, 2023 | Child Custody

California parents looking for truly equal custody arrangements may have some difficulty. Traditional custody arrangements have one parent having primary custody, and both parents alternating weekends. But there are newer custody arrangements available to parents, like nesting.

What is nesting?

Nesting, also called bird nesting, is a unique custody arrangement where the child stays in the family home, while the parents take turns living in the house with their children. Usually, parents will stay for a week at a time to make sure that the children are getting equal time.

This has become a popular custody option because it centers on the children’s comfort. The children aren’t asked to move from house to house or upset their routine. In addition, nesting might provide an opportunity to adjust to their parents not being together anymore. There are a couple of drawbacks to this arrangement, however.

More contact with your ex

Nesting requires parents to cooperate and share a living space, even if they aren’t living in that space at the same time.

For some parents, this can cause a lot of conflicts, as it means you’ll be in contact with your ex-spouse more often than not. Some of these can be addressed by having strict rules for when and how you and your ex-spouse communicate with each other – while still remembering to communicate about your children.

Questions about ownership

The children stay in the family home, but do all of the items? With you and your ex-spouse trading off on the house, there may be disagreements about what furniture belongs to who. This might only happen if things go missing, or are moved without the other parent’s permission.

There can be a written document that addresses the rules surrounding furniture in the home. Generally, if parents are mindful of respecting the space, they might have an easier time. Respecting the space also means not bringing over anyone without your children’s and ex-spouse’s permission.

Should you practice nesting?

Nesting is a beautiful custody option for families that can make it work. It can be a wonderful option for parents who can peacefully co-parent and want to give their children stability.